qzeebrella | (no subject)

(no subject)

I went for a walk today and this poll is a result of something I saw and then had to think twice about.

[Poll #1094602]

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Good poll but I have to say it angers me when people think that women are less 'at risk' of being paedophiles than men. Wrong, wrong, wrong. Women are just as capable of being paedophiles, and just as disgusting.

Why shouldnt parents who love their children kiss them on the lips? This isnt a criticism of you, btw, just a question. I kiss both my kids (1 of each sex) on the lips, although now T is a teen, he usually just turns his cheek LOL. But my kisses arent sexual, my kisses are ones of a parent who loves her children. If you are talking sexual kisses then that is a different catagory altogether.

I have no problems with parents kisssing their children on the lips, as long as it's "appropriate." But when I went walking today, I observed a young black man who kissed his much whiter daughter on the lips twice, quick pecks, and suddenly several pedestrians and one passing motorist was razzing him. Calling him a "pervert". But it wasn't a pervety kind of kiss. And I got to wondering if it were a matter of society going, "it's okay for a mother to do that, but not a father." Which may be the case. Or whether it was because the daughter was obviously lighter skinned than he, in which case it would be possibly a racial thing. As in, "it's okay for a man to kiss his daughter on the lips if they're the same basic colour, but not if the father is darker than the daughter." Since I've never seen passing people razz a white man for kissing his daughter on the lips, though the only ones I have seen doing so are very similar in colour to their daughters.

uh, you're right and wrong.
women are "just as capable" but
men are pedophiles in waaay higher proportion than women.

I don't think it's appropriate for either parent to kiss their children on the lips. Cheeks, top of the head, forehead, all acceptable for deliberate kissing. But kissing on the lips has more sexual connotations in our culture and even when it's done in all innocence, it leaves you open to criticism (at the very least) or worse, open to charges of abuse.

Over here, parents don't kiss their children on the lips. It is 100% an adult, sexual behavior, so I can't really answer this question. I know it's common in other countries, because I've seen it, and it always freaks me out.

I have an odd perspective on that, because before my cousins were born, I would have objected to it, but when my cousins were toddlers they took a liking to kissing people on the lips whenever they said goodbye, and so I'd kiss them on the lips whenever I said goodbye. (One is a boy, two are girls, and they all behaved the same way in this regard.) I didn't really see their parents do it all that much, though, and so I think it was just us (me, my mother, my grandparents) that got kissed, possibly because they didn't see us everyday like they saw their parents. So, yeah, weird toddler kisses, but it was kind of a special occasion because they didn't get to see us often.

Given the cultural connotations of kissing on the lips, I have always been skeeved out by the sight of an adult kissing a child on the lips. Logically, I know that it's probably all on the up and up, but I just tense automatically. My gut reaction is just "oh god, that's so inappropriate". To me, it's not so much the intentions of the person behind it as it is the cultural implications. We as a society (at least in the west) equate kissing on the lips with romance for the most part. It's difficult to separate them on a conscious level, much less the more instinctive ones.

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